Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom’s annoying romance is over

Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom are one-upping Gwyneth’s “conscious uncoupling:” they’re taking a “respectful, loving space” from their relationship. Their reps confirmed as much in a statement to People, “before rumors or falsifications get out of hand.” Mmhm.

Perry, 32, and Bloom, 40, were seen together as recently as Sunday for the annual Vanity Fair Oscars party, because neither of them can resist a photo op.

The two dated for about a year, and within that year, they were very committed to doing the most. There was that time they went paddle boarding with a special appearance from Bloom’s penis. And for Halloween, they pulled the ultimate couple’s costume, with Perry as Hillary Clinton, and Bloom as Donald Trump, because America hadn’t been traumatized enough by the election at that point, I guess.

Bloom, who is an actor sometimes, has already been spotted cozying up with a “Katy Perry look-a-like,” which I think is Daily Mail’s way of saying, “another white lady.”