Across this great nation, millions of people are standing in front of mirrors considering goals for the coming year: Skinnier waist? Fatter wallet? More time with friends? Less time with fries? The result will be a host of resolutions launched like North Korean missiles on Jan. 1, which will — in woefully large numbers — crash into the sea before winter is done. (As evidence, I submit my perennial promise to learn Spanish. “Que pasa, amigo?” Not much, my friend.)
Still, it is an admirable annual exercise and one I think our current president might want to consider, because he is the most unpopular first-year president since modern polling began, and if he wants that to improve, perhaps some changes are in order. So in the spirit of the season, Mr. President, let me offer three possible resolutions:
1. Quit complaining about the people who oppose you. Quit calling them liars and fools. Yes, your most devoted followers love it when you tag a foe with a ridiculous nickname and taunt him/her like a schoolyard tough. But the majority of Americans are put off by that behavior, and it makes it hard for them to give your policies a fair shake, let alone embrace them. You’re hurting yourself when you demonize every person who dares to doubt your magnificence.
2. Stop tweeting so much. Again, I know your fans think this habit of yours is the best thing since the Big Mac, but precious few serious ideas can be expressed in under 280 characters. That’s not even enough to cover the first paragraph of the Gettysburg Address, which is a model of brevity. Perhaps you could confine your tweets to things such as Arbor Day greetings, congratulations to sports teams and your lunch … i.e., “I love pork chops — make America great again!”
3. Knock it off with the demonstrably false statements. I get it: Politicians tell fibs. But when you fling out whoppers which are patently untrue, again — you hurt your own case. Of course, it is entirely up to you whether you take these suggestions to heart. But why not give them a try? Because even if they don’t work, like most of us you’ll have abandoned them by Valentine’s Day anyway.
